Trump Has Tiny Hands PAC Demands Donald Release Measurements

Because electing a president with tiny hands could apparently pose a national security risk

(Photo Illustration: Diana Quach)
Mar 11, 2016 at 7:25 PM ET

A group of concerned citizens have formed a political action committee with the sole intention of proving just how puny Donald Trump’s hands are.

On Monday, Portland, Oregon, resident Henry Kraemer filed with the Federal Election Commission to form the Trump Has Tiny Hands PAC, days after Marco Rubio called Trump’s hand-size into question and his appendages became a primary focus of the presidential debate in Detroit. “In the Republican debate, Mr. Trump was challenged on his hands and he had the temerity to look into the camera and lie to the American people and say that his hands were regular size. Any child can see that’s a lie,” Kraemer told Vocativ.

Kraemer launched on Thursday, and is currently accepting donations, which he says will go towards Internet and television advertisements. He hopes these #ReleaseTheMeasurements ads will force Trump’s hand and uncover the true size of the New York billionaire’s mitts. Kraemer said he will announce how much the PAC has raised late next week.

This PAC, however, doesn’t just want to bring attention to Trump’s alleged dishonesty; Kraemer said he is joined by a “group of patriotic volunteers” who are concerned about national security. “There’s a couple things that really keep us up at night. Say it’s 3 a.m. and the phone rings in the White House. The American people need to know if Mr. Trump’s tiny, baby hands will be able to pick up the receiver. And when Donald Trump inevitably decides to launch a nuclear war—will his stubby, shrimp fingers even be able to push the button down all the way?”

Supporters of the PAC also believe Trump would humiliate the nation—not because of his crass, politically incorrect rhetoric, but because of his possibly disproportionate paws. “He talks about getting tough with China, but how is it going to look when the Chinese Premier goes to shake Mr. Trump’s hand and simply crushes his puny, weakling fingers? That’s going to make America so embarrassed abroad we won’t even be able to travel for years,” Kraemer said.

Small hands or not, Trump still holds a big a lead over his Republican rivals and seems poised to become the party’s nominee this November.