Robots Are Pretty Good With Kids

Sep 23, 2016 at 2:19 PM ET

Leave your children alone with a robot. This robot.

It’s fine. Science says it’s fine. Nothing could possibly go wrong, leaving your children with this robot.

Your children, who were grown from two cells united in an act of love. Your children, who you witnessed growing from helpless babies to toddling humanlings to talking learning people before your eyes. Your children, whose welfare you’d put before your own. You’d jump in front of a car to save their tiny wrists from breaking. You’d fall in broken glass to keep them from bleeding. You’d sell your organs to feed them.

Leave them with this robot. It’ll be fine.