Venezuela's acting President and presidential candidate Nicolas Maduro waves to supporters during a campaign rally at the state of Bolivar, in this picture provided by Miraflores Palace on April 6, 2013. Venezuelans will hold presidential elections on April 14. Picture taken April 6, 2013. REUTERS/Miraflores Palace/Handout (VENEZUELA - Tags: POLITICS ELECTIONS) ATTENTION EDITORS - THIS IMAGE WAS PROVIDED BY A THIRD PARTY. FOR EDITORIAL USE ONLY. NOT FOR SALE FOR MARKETING OR ADVERTISING CAMPAIGNS. THIS PICTURE IS DISTRIBUTED EXACTLY AS RECEIVED BY REUTERS, AS A SERVICE TO CLIENTS

Elect Me President or Face a Curse — and 8 Other Crazy Quotes from Venezuela’s Next Leader

Venezuelans will head to the polls on Sunday to pick a successor to the dearly departed Hugo Chavez, who passed away last month after a battle with cancer. Best known to us as America’s troll-in-chief, Chavez hand-picked his veep Nicolas Maduro to take over once he was gone. Maduro has a double-digit lead in the latest polls.

Last time, we brought you several things to know about the likely next president of Venezuela. Given the heightened tensions between Maduro and his main opponent, Henrique Capriles, we’ve updated the list to include the best of crazy campaign rhetoric — plus the best photos from the campaign trail.

Below are 9 tidbits straight from the horse’s mouth.

 

According to Reuters, the Curse of Macarapana refers to the 16th century battle of the same name, where Spaniards slaughtered the natives.

Maduro is married to the Attorney General of Venezuela, Cilia Flores.

 He has no problem accusing the U.S. of murder plots, whether against him or their own citizens.

Maduro is embroiled in a fight with Puerto Rican musician Willy Colón. Colón released an anti-Maduro, anti-Chavez song accusing the leader of lies — Maduro fought back by accusing him of “kissing the hand of [his] imperial master,” the United States. He also said Colon was participating in a “rumba of hatred.”

Maduro has pledged several times to prove that the U.S. infected Chavez with his fatal cancer.

“We know that our commander ascended to the heights and is face to face with Christ,” Maduro said after an Argentinian cardinal became the first pope from Latin America, Pope Francis. That’s not the only “hand of god” close to Maduro: footballer Diego Maradona appeared at his closing campaign rally this week.

 

He later apologized for the homophobic name-calling, but has since referred to Capriles as “a little princess.”

He singled out former U.S. ambassador to Venezuela Otto Reich and Bush official Roger Noriega as the evil minds behind this nefarious plot.

 No one loves the TSA, but we think this might be a bit too far.

all photo credits: Reuters

Respond Now
ISRAEL

Meet the Man Who Invented Israel's Iron Dome

Ralph Avellino
PHOTOS

Inside Gaza's Smuggling Tunnels

Vocativ Staff
SUDAN

Inside the U.N.'s 850-Calorie "Diet" for Refugees

Mythili Sampathkumar
RELIGION

Religious Kids Are Easy to Fool: Study

Luke Malone
ART

Japanese Artist Arrested for Sharing Directions to 3D Print Her Vagina

Elizabeth Kulze
SOCIETY

This Gadget Texts You if There Are Date-Rape Drugs in Your Drink

Elizabeth Kulze
SCIENCE

There's a Reason Why Learning That Second Language Is So Hard

Emily Levy
TURKEY

Inside Turkey’s Yoga Sex Scandal

Elcin Poyrazlar
Join the Fray
“Rollin’ Coal” Is Pollution Porn for Dudes With Pickup Trucks